Living life with… unwanted surprises
Wednesday 22nd February 2023
Oh how I love to plan. I plan pretty much everything I can. I have a calendar for many things – yearly, monthly, weekly and daily. So when things don’t go to plan I tend to overreact and assume the worst especially when it ruins something I was very excited about. However, recently I have been attempting to see the positive in unwanted changes. To find out my most recent predicament and how I dealt with it.
My most recent unwanted change
For those of you that aren’t aware it was my birthday at the beginning of this month and I had planned out many things in order to celebrate said birthday. Although my actual birthday weekend went swimmingly I additionally had plans the weekend after to go on a night out with my girls which would have been my first night out since my birthday, starting off my twenty twos with a high.
However, a severe unwanted surprise occurred when on Thursday afternoon (with the outing planned and booked for Saturday), whilst I was working from home and a painful headache occurred, later followed by a sore throat, a cough and a blocked nose. I made sure I had a good night sleep that night and Friday rolled around and I wasn’t feeling that much better. Although, I didn’t cancel any plans, in the back of my mind I knew it was likely I wouldn’t be able to continue on and thoroughly enjoy the night. I then almost argued with myself as to why this had to happen on the weekend when I was excited for something I had planned rather than on a weekend where I had nothing planned or better yet had a plan that I didn’t really want to go to.
I continued too hope I would be better by the Saturday so that I could go and enjoy my evening. Then Saturday morning arised, and I woke and was certainly not any better, if anything I was feeling worse. So as I lay in bed feeling sorry for myself I messaged my friends alerting them and proceeded to cancel everything planned that day.
My initial response
As mentioned above my initial response was less than helpful. I resented myself for getting ill, I resented the tubes and cold weather -as that’s where I believed I caught the cold, I resented the fact that I was going to miss out on a day that I had been excited for, for nearly a month and on top of having really bad cold I was just making myself feel worse.
My developed response
After this I realised all of my anger and resentment wasn’t going to change the fact that I was genuinely ill and needed to rest, so instead I focused on the positive. That being that I could have a weekend to rest and rejuvenate, get a few good nights sleep and enjoy sitting on my favourite chair with a nice warm cup of tea and Netflix – ready to binge the Bold type and the new season of You -whilst I got some naps in.
Although my plans fell through they were replaced with more tranquil plans that my body needed and I realised that I had the rest of my life to go out and at least the rest of the year to enjoy my twenty twos so instead of putting pressure of myself to enjoy them when my mind decided I needed to enjoy them I found that I needed to instead respond to how my body felt and allow my mind to catch up.
Therefore, whilst I love planning and will continue to do so this has demonstrated that it is important to acknowledge what your body requires rather than what you’re mind wants to do. Do not force yourself into a situation that you cannot handle or that you won’t enjoy simply because you made-up your mind to enjoy it. Sometimes we put pressure on ourselves to be able to commit to everything we have planned out of fear that we will miss an opportunity or experience but the truth is our lives are filed with opportunities every step of the way and choosing to instead look after yourself and your body is not a missed opportunity but in fact a better one.
So when unwanted surprises occur, although it is completely understandable to be thrown by them, to be upset or annoyed, also give yourself time to acknowledge how it can be beneficial to you or how you may actually need this surprise even if you cannot see it straight away. I do hope you begin to listen to your body more and if you are anything like me and you enjoy planning, continue to do so but don’t let it takeover your entire life and try not to allow yourself to become entity worked up when things don’t go to plan as this is life and unfortunately unwanted surprises are a big part of it.
Have you experienced any unwanted surprises recently? Let me know in the comments below.
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